Feb
24

On turning 30.

Hey y’all, I’m still here. I know it’s been a while since I’ve updated, but I’ve just been living & enjoying life on the road. I told myself when I left Europe I wouldn’t blog during my time in Asia and I haven’t done so. The last 5 months in Asia have been a crazy roller coaster of emotions. From 10 days in Seoul to a month in Tokyo and spending 4 months across Indonesia, Myanmar, Laos & Thailand it’s been full of amazing and frustrating adventures that I will share later. For now though I want to write what’s on my mind… you know my thoughts on turning 30 and because it’s my birthday I can blog if I want to!!!

Infinity Pool, Bangkok

—How I spent my last Saturday in my 30s in Bangkok.—

I woke up this morning in Bangkok, Thailand and I’m the big THREE ZERO.

Yeah, today February 24, 2016 I turned 30.

Thirty!
Treinta.
30…

I say it out loud and it sounds strange. I can’t believe my twenties are over & I’m now in my thirties. EEEEeeeeee I’m getting old.

You know what’s crazy is when I was in my teens I didn’t I want to live past 30. I know that sounds morbid, but I didn’t. When I was younger I was confused with who I was (especially my sexuality) and life in general and thought if I lived to be 30 it would be long enough. I mean 30 years is quite a long time after all. Right? If you break it down it seems even insanely longer:

It’s 3 decades.
It’s 360 months.
It’s 10950 days.
It’s 262800 hours.

In the end I know turning 30 is an age a lot of people never live to see and I’m grateful I have. Today I’m beyond happy to have lived to turn 30 and now want to live well past them… into old age. Ahhh that would be amazing and is way different then I used to think when I was younger.

I look back at my life and can’t believe how far I’ve come and grown. I mean in my twenties alone I finally came out of the closet once and for all to everyone in my life (yeah I came out twice, once in my teens and again in my twenties… very long story).

I did the typical single gay guy bar life and then was arrested for drinking and driving at age 23. I hit rock bottom and was depressed, but little did I know that was going to be the best thing to ever happen in my life. As cliche as it sounds that moment is the moment that changed my life for ever.

DUI - DIVERT - Harris County

While on a year of probation, sober and basically under house arrest I did a lot of soul searching to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. I still remember vividly laying on the floor of my closet listening to Kelly Clarkson on repeat in tears wanting it to all be over and contemplating our purpose in life.

I thought the “American Dream” would answer all my life’s problems. I went back to school after quitting at 19 and quit again and back again because I felt I needed that to live the life I had been conditioned to have. I finally quit once and for all, because I realized I was unhappy and school wasn’t for me. I felt guilty and still do sometimes, but have been happy with my decision since then. Maybe one day I’ll go back… who knows.

During my probation and all the free time I had I planned the trip of a lifetime. I had always wanted to travel the world, but didn’t know it was possible. I did lots of research and was going to quit my job that paid well, but hated to travel 3 months in Europe. Well after reading tons of travel blogs that idea turned into a 2 year trip around the world. Because of that I even started this crazy blog and have managed to stay true to myself in being completely honest.

So yeah I sold just about everything I owned and at 25 let my thoughts and dreams consume me and hit the road never having traveled outside of the USA or Mexico or solo or staying in a hostel or living out of a backpack. I took a chance and it’s a chance I’ve never regretted and one that again changed my life.

Salkantay Trek, Machu Picchu

—After a 5 day trek I made it to Machu Picchu.—

During those two years I was held at gun point, almost arrested and sent to jail, I fell in love in Egypt, pondered if we live in transition and even the purpose of life. I saw some of the most amazing sights on earth and made friends with people from every corner of the world. I experienced more during that time than ever before. It changed the way I saw the world, my own beliefs in life, in religion, and after coming home and dealing with reverse culture shock and semi depression realized it changed the core of who I was for ever.

I got back and got a 9-5 job that paid less, but I actually loved. I knew I wanted to get back out to see more of the world and eventually return to the man I love in Egypt. So am doing just that. I left and started my trip in Mexico, but then went back home to work a bit more and 14 months ago left again to travel the world with no return date back and very soon I’m heading back to Egypt (that’s a whole other story and a whole other bag of emotions).

I would have never imagined I’d be in Bangkok spending my 30th birthday with amazing friends I would have never met if I had never decided to leave home.

According to the world I’m technically a millennial. I’m supposed to be a selfish, self entitled little brat who wants everything handed to them. Honestly, that couldn’t be further from the truth. I know many of the things I have done in my life I couldn’t have done without the help of my family and friends who I love and cherish dearly. I also know I’ve made tons of sacrifices and worked my ass off to be living the life I’m living today. I prefer working like crazy, saving like crazy for a while and then enjoy the fruits of that hard labor on memories not things.

3 day hike between Kalow & Inle Lake, Myanmar

—One of the stunning views during a 3 day hike in Myanmar to Inle Lake.—

While doing that and over the many years of travel I’ve learned that I want a simple life. I don’t want a lot of money or material things. I just want the bit I need to survive with the man I love and live without having to worry about the future because I can survive in the now and know I don’t need a lot of things to live and enjoy life.

I won’t lie life on the road isn’t always easy. It’s not all unicorns and cupcakes as most people imagine. It’s exhausting, frustrating with tons of emotions you never feel unless you’re on the road full time. It’s a side most long term travelers don’t like talking about because we don’t want to sound spoiled and ungrateful. I’ll tell ya now I am exhausted and know I’m ready to settle down for a long while. No worries though I’m not done traveling I still have plenty crazy adventures in the back of my mind that I want to do in my life time. Like the Silk Road (Beijing to Istanbul overland) or the V in Africa (Marrakech to Cape Town to Cairo overland) or spend a year living in Australia. I figured I can do those later in life and if they never happen I’m happy with the adventures I’ve lived already.

I know I have made plenty of mistakes in my life, but I know I’ve learned from them. I have lived life to the fullest and a life I want on my terms. Even if I could I wouldn’t change a thing. Not a single thing, because I know all my past mistakes, heartaches and every moment has brought me to where and who I am today. I always say “we live and we learn” and that’s the best way to live. Learning and growing from our mistakes and our past.

Couch in Dahab, Egypt.

—Looking out into the Red Sea in Dahab, Egypt.—

Ahhhhh I now sit here at the edge of a pool thinking about the many years that I hopefully have ahead. Hell I think about the next year ahead and I have no clue what to expect. The truth is I have no clue what I am doing with my life, but making sure that what I do makes me truly happy. That’s how I think we should all live our lives. Find out what makes you happy and go for it! We have one life to live so why not make the most it. Right?

As for the rest of my life that’s a big mystery… I have plans to go back to Egypt very soon to see what happens with him and if that works out that will take my life in one crazy adventure that may be difficult, but worth it cus love and if not it will go in another direction with a broken heart that I’m sure I’ll overcome and I’ll still make it one crazy amazing adventure.

I know for a fact I don’t want a career and really I have no plans for the next few years of my life and that’s so not like me, but I’ve learned most people don’t know what they’re doing with their lives and that it’s okay to not know. My minor OCD and the control freak in me likes to have things planned and know what’s gonna to happen next, but not for now. I’ve been truly happy for a long time and am fine with not having any big plans and just living in the moment. I’m saying fuck it and gonna let the universe take me on the rest of this wild ride we call life…

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Comments

  1. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! Happy Birthday Jaimito! wow you’re dirty thirty.. Aca-believe it. I am excited you spent part of your bday by the pool. it’s actually cold in Houston right now. Keep living your life on your terms because doing so has helped many people including me. You’re an amazing person with great wisdom at the rip age of 30 and that is just a number. I will tell you after 35 though it does start to go down hill from there.. hahahahaha JK

    I look forward to seeing you in 2017 for the wedding until then cheers to past, present, and future adventures!

    I love you .. besos

    Always
    Your friend Jessica

    • Jaime Davila says:

      OMG y’all are gonna make me cry… love that friends I know from home commented on my blog bajajajaja. No one ever does!!! So omg EEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeee bajajaja I am now dirty thirty. I had a great birthday… of course wished y’all could have been here, but maybe another time. Hope I get to be 35 and omg can’t wait to go home for your wedding. Love you tons.

      xoxo
      PINKY

  2. Awesome read! I never read…so you know I love you lol!
    Keep doing you & be happy mi Jaimito!!! 💜💜💜💜💜💜ya! See ya in 2017!

    • Jaime Davila says:

      OMG Cynthia!!!!! Hey girl hey…. awwwwwwwwww means so much to see a comment from you on here. Thank you so much for commenting. I love you tons & will keep doing me. See ya in 2017 for sure!!! OMG can’t wait!!!

  3. You’re amazinggggg!!!!! <3

  4. Happy Birthday Jaime! Whew, that post just reminded me how long I’ve been following your blog! Cheers to more adventures and I’m eager to know what happens the next time you visit Egypt for him 🙂 Stay happy <3
    Micamyx|Senyorita recently posted..Relaxing Weekend in Baguio City

    • Jaime Davila says:

      Thank you so much!!! Thank you for the birthday wishes and for following along for so long. Cheers to more adventures and for an unknown future!

  5. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!! I’m so happy for you and so proud of you for following your dreams for all these years. I’m excited and nervous for you, for this next leap you’re taking. I hope everything works out because I soooo want you to be happy! And I totally understand that feeling of wanting things planned out, so having your future beyond the next few days so wide open, a true anything-could-happen situation, is almost too much to wrap my head around. Can’t wait to hear how it all goes and what happens next. I’ll be thinking of you!
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    • Jaime Davila says:

      Thank you so much Ali, you know I read your comment and thought… “I would have never met her if I had never started this blog…”. I know we don’t talk all the time but love that we can at anytime and pick up as if nothing. I appreciate your friend ship so much. Oh & girl… ahhhh I am so nervous it’s insane. As for my life oh you know me and my OCD. It’s hard to let go, but I am… I am honestly just going with the flow. What ever opportunities come up will take them as they come. I’ll keep ya post as we always do with our crazy lives.

  6. Good to see another from you, only thinking the other day that had not seen anything for a bit! Good to know your well.. And Happy Birthday for the other day.. Stay safe..

    • Jaime Davila says:

      Thanks so much Bernice, for the birthday wishes and following along. Yeah, hopefully soon will blog all about my time in Asia and finish writing about the rest of my South America adventures too.

  7. Dan Barber says:

    You are an amazing individual with a lot of courage and love. I so hope things work out the best for you! I’m inspired by you! I’m also rooting for you 100%

  8. Happy birthday Jaime! Hope our paths cross again soon.

  9. Happy Birthday! I keep wishing I could have met you when you were in São Paulo! Next time, for sure! I like your writing and I (selfishly) wish you’d post more.
    I wish you the best with your move back to Cairo to be with your boyfriend. I know you are going with the flow and believing whatever is meant to be, will be. I don’t want to get in the way of your beliefs. But Jaime, as someone who is with a man from a different country– and as someone who used to have that same philosophy–I would also temper that with reality. Start gathering documentts and tangible proof that you both have a relationship. The bureaucratic demands of the laws that be can’t be underestimated. If you need any advice, let me know. I apologize for assuming you’d even want my advice. But when I first got involved with my partner, I couldn’t find anyone going through what I was going through. I had to do it alone and it was hard!

    • Jaime Davila says:

      Hey David… ah I always love getting comments from you & I too wish we could have met up in Sao Paulo. Thank you so much for the compliment about my writing. No worries I think I will be posting more soon, about Asia and more about South America too. As for your advice… please know that it is always welcome. I’m happy to hear from someone going through this or has been through it so don’t apologize and give away any time. I so understand what you are saying and yes I have quite a few things that go back to when we met and so on and if I’m back for a while and it works out would love to do even more to make it more obvious that we are together. I know it’s going to be a long bureaucratic process and even more so cus he is from an Arab/Muslim country. So we shall see what happens. For now just wanna arrive and see what happens. I hope it all works out. I’m so terrified and so excited and it’s a million feelings… ahhhhhh!!! I can’t wait though.

  10. First off, Happy Birthday, Jaime!

    Second, welcome back! Eh, so what if your blog has dust bunnies? You’ve been enjoying your travels, and that is more important than anything. In time, you can choose to share your journey and (mis)adventures with us. We don’t mind waiting 🙂

    You have a good head on your shoulders (literally and figuratively, ha!). But seriously, some people don’t learn the lessons you have at your age. I never chased stuff, but I did fall into the trap that is the “American Dream” in terms of having a “career.” Like you, it wasn’t the life I wanted, but for years, I didn’t know how to get myself out of it. I finally managed to shock that monkey (Peter Gabriel style) off my back a few years ago. It can be difficult going against the grain, but at least you’re living life at your own terms and no one else’s.

    When you think about it, you’ve managed to accomplish something incredibly amazing before you reached 30. You traveled the world twice! That is awesome in itself. I wish I would have followed my gut back in university by quitting school to backpack South America for a year. But while I’m a bit late on my plans, I am going to make it happen this year.

    And I totally get where you’re coming from about wanting a simple life. You truly don’t need a lot of stuff to be happy. In fact, I become more happy when I became a minimalist and started getting rid of stuff. Here’s to simple living 🙂

    Good luck with the rest of your travels. I hope things work out for you and him, and I’m wishing you both the highest forms of happiness and well being!

    • Jaime Davila says:

      Awww thanks a ton Summar. It’s good to hear from people who read my blog that it’s okay to have some dust bunnies…lol. I will be posting soon… I hope! Thank you so much for all the kind words. I won’t lie it hasn’t been easy, but I am glad I am where I am today and figured things out sooner rather than later. Even if it took me the hard way to learn it was worth it. You know I didn’t think about it like that… that I traveled the world twice. I just saw it as living life on my terms and being happy. It’s never too late to travel the world… so if you haven’t done so yet you sure can!!! Live with no regrets… and if you have some do what you need to do to make them right! Oh & yes I so want a simple and happy life. Travel has taught me that I don’t need stuff to be happy and like you the less I own the happier I am. Even though still buy few souvenirs jajaja. Thanks again for everything and I hope things work out for us too. If you ever need help planning a trip… let me know. I’m always happy to help people.

      • You’re welcome!

        And living your life on your terms and being happy should be the default state for everyone. I had that lesson halfway figured out since I was a teen, but I didn’t completely let go until recently. It feels great to just live without concerning myself with anyone’s expectations but my own.

        You’re absolutely right about it never being too late to travel. My plans got pushed back, but I’m aiming to be on the road before the end of the year. I’m going to travel slowly, ideally staying in one country 1-3 months. Since I’m a photographer (among other things), I want to really take my time in a place to capture the atmosphere. Oh and I may take you up on your help when I travel to Peru. My future spouse to be has decided that we’re going to hike the Inca Trail. I just hope my fitness holds up by the time we get there. Hahaha!

  11. Diana (Colombia-Denver, CO) says:

    Once a good friend of mine told me that she wanted to be like me when she was a grown up (en sentido de broma)(and actually she is a year older than me). Ahora es mi turno de decirte, Jaime que quiero ser como tú cuando crezca 😜, Inclusive sabiendo que tengo más años que tú… Jajaaj enserio, de admirar todas tus aventuras. Sigue pasándola de lo mejor y cuídate mucho siempre!
    Un abrazo fuerte!

    • Jaime Davila says:

      Awwwww DIANA!!!! OMG i love seeing a comment from you on here. I love everything you said. Muchas Gracias!!! Un abrazo y un beso!!!

  12. Aries_Boy says:

    Belated happy birthday, Jamie! I wish you all the best in life.

    So i see from your Instagram account that you’re still in Thailand. Do you probably have any plan to visit vietnam this April? I’ll be there for a week or two and would love to meet you if we’re happen to be in the same city.

    • Jaime Davila says:

      Thank you so much Aries! Sorry for the late reply. Sadly I have left Asia and went to Egypt and I am now home for a few months. Went to Vietnam my first time around and loved it. Hopefully our paths cross one day.

  13. Happy (belated) birthday Jaime! I have no idea how soon your version of soon is, but I hope it is really soon as I have been following you since you last left Egypt. I am so rooting for you to live a life of happiness with him. <3

    • Jaime Davila says:

      Jajajaja well you know now Jennifer that soon was less than a week later. Thank you for the birthday wishes.

  14. Probably afraid to stand on the edge of the pool 🙂

  15. Happy bday! You are really amazing. I like your post. It is very interesting and inspiring post., Thanks.

  16. You are amazing.. Good to see u. Awesome read up your article. It really interesting post. Keep doing.

  17. Yeah very interesting to read!! Glad things went well for you..

  18. Belated Happy bday! You are an amazing individual with a lot of courage and love. This is interesting post and article. Thanks for sharing it.

  19. I would like to say that this blog really convinced me to do it! Thanks, very good post. 
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  20. Good to read, Congrats to complete 10 year and you shared always good post on your blogs. Its really amazing way to enjoy.

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