I’m out of breath… dehydrated, drenched in sweat and exhausted. I wish I could say that it’s from hiking to the summit of Volcano Villarica, but that’s not the case. I’ve been hiking up loose gravel for an hour and a half. I’m sitting here 1,800 meters from the base of the volcano and can’t go further. I’m a bit disappointed in myself, but at the same time I’m not. After hiking 400 meters I’m happy I made it this far and I’m comforted with the fact that I know myself enough to know my limits. I’ve hiked many volcanos in the past, but none quite as tall as this and never with snow. That’ actually where my thing with Toe Touches all started to begin with.
–View of Volcano Villarica from Pucon right outside my hostel.–
–At the start of the hike. I should have taken the fucking ski lift.–
As I sit here I wish I had brought my journal to write this down in there, but instead I’m typing this up on my iPod. Oh how I love this little thing. I figured I’d write my thoughts here and then copy and paste it when I get back to the hostel and publish it in the blog. I know shocking I actually wanna post on my blog. Yeah about that… I’m not gonna apologize for not blogging, but I am gonna thank you for being patient and if you’ve been following along for years I want you to know that I appreciate you tons. If you’re new to my blog welcome I’m just me and share my thoughts and adventures as they are. I hadn’t written in months because I just hadn’t felt like it. It’s actually easier to not blog then to blog. Who would of thought?!? On top of that when I left to Mexico on my first attempt to start my 2nd trip around the world I didn’t realize until I was on the road what a mess I was emotionally and it got to me big time. I had a blast in Mexico and made many memories some adventurous, some scandalous, some crazy, some fun, and everything in between. The best thing about it is that those memories are mine & only mine. Okay well mine and the people I shared them with in person and the few things I shared on Instagram. I had never traveled and not blogged so it was actually very nice to enjoy it.
–This is where I wrote the majority of this blog post.–
Now that I’m back on the road I feel like going back home for 3 months was meant to happen and for the best. Like I mentioned before I was at a perfect stopping point in after 2.5 months in Mexico. At that point I was also finally emotionally stable. I know sounds dramatic but I just needed to do that and get over my situation with him so I could carry on. Of course I still miss him and think about him all the time, but it took me a while to just come to terms with our situation so I can be. So now I am and am actually fine and know I’ll see him again when I’m ready to go back and just hope it’s not too late.
As for my 3 months at home. Wow… just wow. They were beyond amazing. I’m so happy I went back home. I spent so much time with my family and friends and it was just great. I felt like this time around I cherished even more the time I spent with them because I knew it was only for 3 months and this time for real was leaving and didn’t know when I’m going back home.
Sorry for that tangent just felt like I needed to share what’s been going in my life. Of course I could write a ton more but I’ll leave at that and now carry on with my blog as if I never left.
I’m sitting here and well I’m not alone. It’s 3 of us who couldn’t go beyond so I don’t feel bad. It’s taken me for ever to write this cus we are also chatting about our past travels and future travels and so on.
Anyway I was the very last one in my group and struggling a lot. Like seriously as I was hiking up groups and groups kept passing me up and my feet were going numb. My guide Blas was nice enough to stay at my pace and to even give me his hiking sticks after I asked him why they didn’t rent those out for us too…lol. He kept saying “Vamos Jaime. Si puedes” “Lets go Jaime. Yes you can”. I’ve been sitting down for a while and my calf muscles still hurt a lot. It didn’t help that yesterday I hiked 12 miles to find a waterfall off the beaten path (more on that later). I’m in a piece of shade because the sun is scorching hot. For now I’m just gonna stop for a bit and enjoy the view cus even from up here its spectacular. I’ll write some more in a few hours. Yeah I’ve got to wait here 4 hours because thats how much longer of a hike they have. Yeah I would have fucking died hiking up there. Seriously 4 more hours. No thank you. Oh & to top it off again you slide your way down and I’ll be honest the entire time I was more terrified of that because last time I slid down a volcano I nearly died. Yeah I tumbled down it & wrote about it. Anyway okay I’ll be back later.
I’m back. Yeah as I sit here my mind keeps racing “Should I have continued or not. Would I have made it to the top if I hadn’t stopped?” Ugh it sucks but oh well it is what it is and too late now. Another group just returned they couldn’t summit either. So now it’s about 10 of us sitting here. At least they tried to go further I didn’t. I wanna say I don’t care because I don’t, but then I feel like I do care. The other thing I should have mentioned is I had the option to take the ski lift to the point I’m at now, but stubborn me didn’t want to take it because had I reached the top I would have been able to say I hiked the whole thing. Yeah now look at me I only hiked to the end of the ski lift. Ahh pride… the things it makes us do. Yeah I’m gonna blame it on pride. That’s what I like to blame quite a few things lately. Even though it’s just me being me. I’ll be okay I’ll have other volcanos or mountains to hike, but yeah may not wanna do them.
Ahhhh the view is spectacular from here. Seriously I can see other volcanos from up here and the small towns of Pucon and Villarica.
So yeah few hours later I’m still waiting for the group to come back. The wind has picked up a lot now and I’m actually freezing cold. The good thing and I know this is gonna sound horrible, more and more people are coming back and it’s because they couldn’t summit. I don’t know why that makes me feel a little better. I still hate that at least they tried it and just a few minutes ago I thought if they all had to turn around because of the wind it would also make me feel better. I swear I’m not evil I just can’t help the thoughts that cross my mind. What’s reassuring though is everyone who has returned and now it’s been over 20 people say it was extremely hard. So yeah I don’t feel bad because honestly I still know I couldn’t have done it. I’m so ready to get back to the base and head back to the hostel but it’s gonna be a while.
Ahhhh well I’m back at the base of the volcano. Shit why can’t going up be as easy as going down. Well for now I’m just gonna relax and get back to the hostel. I’ll finish this post when I get back to the hostel and am gonna post the post.
So yeah I’m back in the hostel and I actually feel a bit shitty. I’m literally sitting in my dorm room bed and so fucking happy NO ONE from my 6 bed room dorm went on the hike. Even though about 20 people from the hostel did none from my room did. The reason that makes me happy is because yeah I just feel ashamed for not hiking it. Everyone got back down and asked what happened to me and I just explained to them after hiking to the end of the chair lift my legs gave out. That my feet when numb and my calf muscles were in a knot and that’s all the truth, but it still sucks. Part of the tour was to have a beer when you got back and everyone opened them and were excited and cheered for conquering it. I grabbed my beer had a sip and came up here to finish this.
I know it’s only been a few hours, but I honestly feel okay. I know I have hiked many volcanos in the past and know I will have the opportunity to hike many more. Sucks this wasn’t cheap (cost $70) and part of the reason I came here was to hike that volcano, but oh well I know I couldn’t have done it and something I don’t like doing is lying to myself. You win some and you lose some. I know while I am here I will feel a bit bad because I will see everyone who did do it and well yeah I was the guy who didn’t. I told myself this while I was up there “Jaime you have a long trip ahead of you and will have the chance to do many more amazing things so don’t get down on yourself.” So I’m not gonna get down on my self… So there you have it hiking Volcano Villarica was not a Volcano I could conquer, but the best part of it all is that it gave me the urge to start writing in my blog again. So EEEEEeeeeee I’m back!!!
Oh & tips for people who find this because they want to hike Volcano Villarica… TAKE THE SKI LIFT… SERIOUSLY JUST TAKE IT. I keep thinking if I had taken it I think I could have at least hiked halfway up to the summit… but whatever. If you need anything else just contact me and I’ll be more than happy to help you out. If you want to know more about Volcano Villarica itself click the link.
Oh & yeah y’all I am back… I have a few post I want to write and share with y’all. I will for sure, but the WiFi has been shit the further south I go so I will post when I can. I loved that I documented my last trip in a journal and in a blog and I want to do the same with this one. Even though I don’t go back and re-read my entries I want them there for if one day I do wanna I can. As for the blog I hope it continues to inspire people to be happy. Seriously y’all follow your dream and be happy. As always if any of you need anything contact me and when I get a chance I will reply. You can also follow me on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram where I update a lot more often then here! I will also reply to every comment I receive when I get the chance because I always love hearing from y’all.